Yom Basar

The Holy Day of Meat

The Origin of Yom Basar
Chilchot Yom Basar

Dates

this is where you talk about the dates

The origins of Yom Basar can be traced back to the time of the Creation of the Universe. In the beginning God sought to create the perfect world.  A world built of amazing creatures, and the environment to grow and sustain abundant foods for all those creatures that walked his beautiful Earth.

Man was just a miserable being, vegetarian and without any work or companionship. Man was slow and unarmed. Vegetables and fruits were all he could enjoy. In a moment of grandeur, God decided that enough is enough. Maspik! Man has the right to be happy. Man needs something to look forward to. After a painful surgery, Man’s nemesis was created and God’s plan backfired. Companionship was not enough to bring joy to Adam. His son Abel offered animal sacrifice to God; the burnt offering was all that God wanted. Man, on the other hand, enjoyed the smell but now man needed more.

Noah and those who came after him, started the triumphant consumption of meat. BBQ became the norm. However, something was missing. God commanded all sorts of holidays to be celebrated for all eternity, but there was room for one more. After centuries of wandering aimlessly around several worlds and dimensions God tripped and fell right on top of Prophet Wasserman and Prophet Marx. God said do you want some meat to rejoice? The two vagrants still concussed said: whatever dude! Yom Basar was born, and prophets Wasserman and Marx were the first ones to celebrate God’s gift to Mankind. Yom Basar came into being and immediately was celebrated worldwide. There is no set date for Yom Basar! The beauty of the holiday is that it can be celebrated whenever and wherever one desires to honor God’s blessings and wisdom. For reasons unknown to Men, the Womenfolk were less than pleased with the Holiday. They have been pleading for liberty, equality, and fraternity. Their communal aversion to the tenets of the holiday have been a big obstacle for their full acceptance. There is hope. Every year they come closer and closer to being fully accepted. Inclusion is the next step for the holiday. There are clear winds of reformation in the air. A separate creation story of Yom Basar is based upon a less acceptable legend. Prophet Wasserman was sick of being limited by the laws of kashrut.  He might have said that if there are days when one is limited to the point of not eating or drinking anything for 25 hours, one should have a day to eat anything one wants or desires. Prophet No Fun Marx said this is a funny concept but that is not how it works.  With the proper Divine inspiration Yom Basar, The Holy Day of Meat, was established as an alternative to the everything goes day.

Shabbat shalom

Rogerio

  1. A day, a Holy day, when Man, joined by his fellow Men, rejoice.
      2. How does one rejoice? the sages ask.
    • Partaking of meat, much meat. He must aim to eat his own weight in meat.
    • Variety is required. Different kosher animal species are mandated. Different cuts of the same animal will be acceptable if different kosher animal species are not readily available.
    • Beer must be stupidly cold.
    • Carbs are an abomination.
    • Al ha’esh. All meats must be prepared in an outside grill or smoker.
    • Hallel must recited during morning prayers on Yom Basar. No tachanun.
    • Pesach rules apply when it comes to not eating bread.
    • The only approved dessert is Single Malt Scotch, minimum 18 years. Bourbon could be used if the Scotch bottle ends unexpectedly.
    • The presence of women and children are to be avoided. They offer unnecessary distraction to the holiness of the moment. If unavoidable, hot dogs and hamburgers are their only choice to be prepared in a separate grill. All vegetarian and vegan requests shall be met by immediate expulsion and removal.
  2. A day, a Blessed day, when God’s goodness shrouds all Men of pure faith in the bounties of nature.
  3. A day, a Sacred day, when thousands of years of “evolution” reverts to Cave Man manners. Plates and Silverware optional.
  4. A day, a Mystical day, when life is full of beauty and sacredness.
  5. A day, a Transcendent day, when meat will lead people to feel better about their lives.
  6. A day, an Esoteric day, when the initiated Man will know what to do, when to do it and how to spend the day fully in pure bliss.
  7. A day, a Magical day, when the laws of physics and logic are all valid due to the allowed gender and age of the participants.
  8. A day, a Perplexing day, why are there non Yom Basar days?
  9. A day, a Complex day, when the strict observance of the Halachot adds to the enjoyment of day; it nothing from it.
  10. A day, an Enigmatic day, the simple presence of a woman erases all of the above!
Maimonides is Yom Basar’s intellectual godfather.
Mishneh Torah, Rest on a Holiday 6:18
(18) The children, for example, should be given parched grain, nuts, and sweetmeats; the womenfolk should be presented with pretty clothes and trinkets according to one’s means; the menfolk should eat meat and drink wine, for there is no real rejoicing without the use of meat and wine.

The essence of Yom Basar!

Pesachim 49b:3
תַּנְיָא, רַבִּי אוֹמֵר: עַם הָאָרֶץ אָסוּר לֶאֱכוֹל בְּשַׂר, (בְּהֵמָה) שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״זֹאת תּוֹרַת הַבְּהֵמָה וְהָעוֹף״: כׇּל הָעוֹסֵק בַּתּוֹרָה מוּתָּר לֶאֱכוֹל בְּשַׂר בְּהֵמָה וָעוֹף.

It was taught in a baraita that Rabbi Yehuda HaNasi says: It is prohibited for an ignoramus to eat meat, as it is stated: “This is the law [torah] of the beast and of the fowl” (Leviticus 11:46). He expounds: Anyone who engages in Torah study is permitted to eat the meat of animals and fowl.

Some simple guidelines

Deuteronomy 14:3-6
לֹ֥א תֹאכַ֖ל כׇּל־תּוֹעֵבָֽה׃ זֹ֥את הַבְּהֵמָ֖ה אֲשֶׁ֣ר תֹּאכֵ֑לוּ שׁ֕וֹר שֵׂ֥ה כְשָׂבִ֖ים וְשֵׂ֥ה עִזִּֽים׃ אַיָּ֥ל וּצְבִ֖י וְיַחְמ֑וּר וְאַקּ֥וֹ וְדִישֹׁ֖ן וּתְא֥וֹ וָזָֽמֶר׃ וְכׇל־בְּהֵמָ֞ה מַפְרֶ֣סֶת פַּרְסָ֗ה וְשֹׁסַ֤עַת שֶׁ֙סַע֙ שְׁתֵּ֣י פְרָס֔וֹת מַעֲלַ֥ת גֵּרָ֖ה בַּבְּהֵמָ֑ה אֹתָ֖הּ תֹּאכֵֽלוּ׃

You shall not eat anything abhorrent. These are the animals that you may eat: the ox, the sheep, and the goat; the deer, the gazelle, the roebuck, the wild goat, the ibex, the antelope, the mountain sheep, and any other animal that has true hoofs which are cleft in two and brings up the cud—such you may eat.

Deuteronomy 12:20
כִּֽי־יַרְחִיב֩ יְהֹוָ֨ה אֱלֹהֶ֥יךָ אֶֽת־גְּבֻלְךָ֮ כַּאֲשֶׁ֣ר דִּבֶּר־לָךְ֒ וְאָמַרְתָּ֙ אֹכְלָ֣ה בָשָׂ֔ר כִּֽי־תְאַוֶּ֥ה נַפְשְׁךָ֖ לֶאֱכֹ֣ל בָּשָׂ֑ר בְּכׇל־אַוַּ֥ת נַפְשְׁךָ֖ תֹּאכַ֥ל בָּשָֽׂר׃

When יהוה enlarges your territory, as promised, and you say, “I shall eat some meat,” for you have the urge to eat meat, you may eat meat whenever you wish.

Ben Yehoyada on Pesachim 109a:3
It seems to me that, with God’s help, happiness must be complete for both body and soul, meaning that the body enjoys eating meat and the soul enjoys identifying the holy sparks that appear from eating the meat…
Numbers 11:4
(4) The riffraff in their midst felt a gluttonous craving; and then the Israelites wept and said, “If only we had meat to eat!
Sifrei Devarim 75:4
“and you will say: I shall eat flesh, for your soul will desire to eat flesh”
Shulchan Arukh, Orach Chayim 250:2
(2) A person should have more meat, wine and treats, to the best of his ability.
Mishnah Chullin 3:7
(7) And with regard to grasshoppers, whose signs were also not stated in the Torah, the Sages stated: Any grasshopper that has four legs, and four wings, and two additional jumping legs, and whose wings cover most of its body, is kosher. – Grasshoppers should not be consumed at Yom Basar at this time. A t’shuvah is forthcoming.
Shabbat 129b:2
רַב וּשְׁמוּאֵל דְּאָמְרִי תַּרְוַיְיהוּ: הַאי מַאן דְּעָבֵיד מִילְּתָא — לִישְׁהֵי פּוּרְתָּא וַהֲדַר לֵיקוּם — דְּאָמַר מָר: חֲמִשָּׁה דְּבָרִים קְרוֹבִין לְמִיתָה יוֹתֵר מִן הַחַיִּים, וְאֵלּוּ הֵן: אָכַל וְעָמַד, שָׁתָה וְעָמַד, יָשֵׁן וְעָמַד, הִקִּיז דָּם וְעָמַד, שִׁימֵּשׁ מִטָּתוֹ וְעָמַד.

It was Rav and Shmuel who both said: With regard to one who performs the practice of bloodletting, let him wait a bit and then let him rise, as the Master said: There are five matters that render one closer to death than life, and they are these: If one ate and immediately rose, if one drank and rose, if one slept and immediately rose, if one let blood and rose, if one engaged in conjugal relations and rose.

Sanhedrin 59b:13-14
אמר רב יהודה אמר רב אדם הראשון לא הותר לו בשר לאכילה

Rav Yehuda says that Rav says: Meat was not permitted to Adam, the first man, for consumption.

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